To Read, or Not to Read?

Disclaimer: Before you venture any further into this blog, I must warn you. If you loathe reading with an un-Christian passion, then may want to turn around while you still can. However… if you love reading, you will definitely know what I’m talking about. :)

I love reading… I love reading books… I love smelling the pages of books. Shoot, I just love books in general.

I can’t put my finger on it but there is just something about having a book in my hand or safely tucked  in my purse that makes me feel…

-like I can conquer the world and do anything I set my mind to

-that I’m some kind of a superhero… with reading super powers

-just plain natural and “right”

I guess it’s like a nerd carrying a calculator, or a farmer wearing pliers on their belt, or an artist having different forms of media on their hands. I oftentimes find myself just carrying a book around just to have one close by… even if I may not get a chance to read it.

When I go on vacation or when I come home for the Christmas break, I have at least 5 or 6 books stuffed in my backpack, barely leaving room for anything else.

If I am ever having a bad day or I’m just down… just buying a book lifts my spirits.

But…

Yes, I know. There’s always that “but…” that just puts a damper on everything. However, I must say that this “but…” is actually of major consequence.

There is one thing I hate about reading and books… and that is the hangover that follows those really great books.

Wait… let’s back up for a second. I can almost imagine some of the looks on your faces as you sit their at your computer with the most puzzled look on your face as you reread that last sentence, which I’m about to clear right up. No need to worry.

By “hangover”, I mean the feeling that washes over you after you turn the last page in a really great book that you’re reading and realize that you have reached the end. The end means:

-that the “light at the end of the tunnel” is right smack dab in front of me, blinding me. No matter how much I try to prolong that “light at the end of the tunnel”, I am racing through the pages trying to figure out the story ends. Oh I dread that “light at the end of the tunnel”…

-that the story is over… no more… finished… expired… dead. Some authors have the audacity to leave the readers with an awful ending, which makes me want to destroy the book in a violent fashion: burning in a fire, tearing and ripping the pages up, simply throwing the book out the window while I’m traveling down the road as well as various other forms of violent actions.

-my emotions are all in an uproar… I may be crying, screaming, or just simply staring at the last page because I’m stunned.

(I’m going to tell you something that nobody else knows.. so shhh! Sometimes, I get so caught up in a book that I catch myself taking up some of the characteristics of the character…. and usually it’s the character flaws. I have to remind myself that I’m Abigail Grace Miller and I’m not the brooding, sarcastic Will Herondale from The Infernal Devices Series by Cassandra Clare or that I’m not Harry Potter with the ability to perform magic or that I’m not Bella Swan with an amazing vampire boyfriend.)

While it’s inevitable, that final page/paragraph/sentence/word tears me up and just eats at my soul… leaving me with the worse feeling in the world: emptiness. It’s almost as if their is a hole where my heart once was… I’ve either:

-reached the end of a book that has no sequel… It’s as the characters and their story just dies right then and there on the spot, which feels like you’re drinking a really good Dr. Pepper with extra, extra, extra ice from Sonic and all the sudden it vanishes in mid sip… or like you’re singing church songs in the shower, lathering your hair with shampoo when the electricity and water goes out.

-reached the end of a entire series that I’ve been reading for a very long time… It’s as if the characters from the book have become part of my life, like we’re friends and all the sudden… they are just gone. Poof!

-reached the end of book with a sequel has yet to come out and wont for a very long time… It’s as if the characters and the story are all the sudden frozen in time and can’t progress with their story until the sequel comes out.

 

When I finish a book, and it’s really really really good, it’s as if I’m in a slump for many days. I have such a hard time getting back into my “reading mood” because it’s so hard to find another book as amazing to read. If I do find a book and it’s mediocre, reading it just doesn’t feel the same.

All of these things just frustrate me… which brings me to the question: is it worth to read those amazing books, only to get a literature hangover in return? To read, or not to read?

After much deliberation and thinking, I reached my conclusion:

it’s better to have read and feel that inevitable emptiness that comes with those really great books than to not have read at all. 

So I encourage you to keep on reading.

Trudge On!…. or should I say, “Read On!”? :)

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