Philly Cheesesteaks and Papers, Baby!

Only four weeks of school, seventy pages to write (including a twenty-five page beast for my honors thesis), seven books to read, at least four all-nighters, and three tests to go.

Awesome.  I feel like I might not make it.  This month is probably going to be the most intense of my undergraduate career.  Bring it on.  This is all I have before I will officially by an alumnus of this fine institution.

I find that if I take Richard Dreyfuss’s advice in What About Bob? I can actually survive and even thrive.  I try not to think about all that I have to do because it will only drive me to despair and back to my recently ditched habit of Dr. Pepper addiction.

At least, I have somewhat of a plan for my summer and next fall.  I just have to make it to May 8.

I was accepted to the two graduate institutions I had applied to, and, after a suicide trip to New England during spring break, I know where I want to go and will be moving to Philadelphia the first week of June.

This is quite terrifying and exciting all at the same time.

I have always wanted to live in the real city.  I love the energy, the diversity, the coolness, and the culture of the big city.  I also cannot wait to take classes I care a lot more about.  It is going to be awesome to live an hour and a half from New York City and three hours from Washington D.C.  As an American historian, Philadelphia is such a rich treasure house of ridiculous history, like Independence Hall and the Liberty Bell.

However, I have lived in Canyon for the past fourteen years.  I have developed a ridiculous community and support system here at WT.  There are many people here that I love and that love me.  Also, I have a physical disability that prevents me from being fully-functioning at times.

So even though moving to the fifth largest city in America is extremely exciting and I know its what I need to do, I still have considerable reservations and fears about June.

It would be an absolute shame, though, to be ruled by fear.  Even though I am quite fearful, God has been faithful to reveal time and time again that I have what it takes through his strength and spirit.  This is one of the most important confidences a man needs to have.  The principle question a man deals with is “Do I have what it takes?”  This question is even more important when dealing with a disabled person.

About two weeks ago, I had a flat tire around 12:45 on a Sunday night.  Now, it is important for the reader to know how mechanically savvy I am not.  I actually ruined my first car because I didn’t know you were supposed to change the oil in it.  So once I realized I had a flat, the despair set in.  I immediately called a friend who I assumed was still awake.  Unfortunately she didn’t answer.

I paused and a determination set in.  I can do this.  So I got out of the car and began the tedious, for me at least, work of replacing the flat tire.  It was amusing, at one point, I had hiked the car up off the ground and was attempting to pull the tire off.  The tire just would not come up.  Then, I realized that I had to take the bolts off first.  Duh!!

Anyway, I did it.  I survived the flat tire and successfully put on the donut.  It did take me about 45 minutes but I did it.  It was if God was showing me that I didn’t need to fear anymore.  He is with me and has and will give me everything that I need.

So, even though I am terrified of leaving this haven where I know and love so many people, it is time to leave.  It is time to have my own adventure with God.  It is time to be a real man and adult.  And I am excited about this.  So I will end this blog with a challenge. . . Philadelphia, Bring it On!

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